What IS A Politician!?


Dictionary.com:

pol‧i‧ti‧cian  /ˌpɒlɪˈtɪʃən/ Pronunciation Key - Show Spelled Pronunciation[pol-i-tish-uhn]

1.	a preternatural being, commonly believed to be a reanimated corpse, that is said to suck the blood of sleeping persons at night.

2.	any nonhuman animal, esp. a large, four-footed mammal.

3.	a large aquatic animal resembling a serpent or a plesiosaurlike reptile, reported to have been seen in the waters of Loch Ness, Scotland, but not proved to exist.

4.	a person whose position or fortune is owed to someone or something and who continues under the control or influence of that person or thing.

5.	a stupid, mean, or contemptible person.

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Should I Eat A Politician?

It is not recommended, considering the ammount of poisons found inside of a politician. Eating one may cause harm to your skin in the form of severe acne or rashes. Breakouts will occur randomly for approximately three months after the consumption.


Here is a diagram of the chemical structure of a politician.


If I Can't Eat it, What Do I Do With It?

Politicians are often known for being rather feisty, so do not get too close to them. If you wave a red flag in front of them, they may be easily angered and possibly chase after it. Dodging a politician from charging you is the best possible choice.

To capture a politician, or multiple politicians, it is recommended that you follow the following procedure at this link:

How To Capture a Politician

When using a politician, remember to always wear protective gear.



Politicians are possibly one of the greatest mysteries on planet earth and it is required to handle them with care. Accidently dropping one may result in a severe catastrophe.



So, If Politicians Are So Fucking Difficult to Deal With, Why the Hell Haven't We Made Them Extinct?

Err... Um...

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INTERESTING NEWS:

You wouldn’t catch me dead in Iraq/ The Times

"Many of the deserters are not pacifists, against war per se, but they view the Iraq war as wrong. First Lt Watada, for instance, said he would face prison rather than serve in Iraq, though he was prepared to pack his bags for Afghanistan to fight in a war that he considered just."